discipline your disappointments.

So I was feeling bummed about the way things are with “Tom,” about how he’s not being such a great friend and whenever there’s an emotionally charged situation, he’ll be very short with his answers, which then come off as “not caring.” I’m sure he doesn’t mean it that way. I just think he doesn’t know what to do in these types of situations so he freezes. I get it. But I mean, if we’re going to be friends…let alone friends who tell each other everything, I have to be able to feel like I’m not a burden, which is nearly impossible because that’s how I always feel when I try and talk about my problems. Some of them seem trivial and it’s like what’s the point? But anyways, the fact of the matter is that if these people were my so-called “friends,” they wouldn’t mind listening to me rant about stupid stuff because that’s what friends do. They help each other get through difficult situations. It’s like Phillip Phillips says, “When enemies are at your door, I’ll carry you away from way if you need help. Your hope dangling by a string, I’ll share in your suffering to make you well.” (I LOVE that song!)

Well, so the point of this was that I updated my status saying I need to lower my expectations because I hate being disappointed. And one of my friends left a profound comment that I can’t get over. He said his mentor told him, “Learn to discipline your disappointment.” I really like that! I hate saying I’m going to lower my expectations of people because I’m someone who strives to see the best in others. And not only that, lowering your expectations is sort of like “the easy way out.” But learning to discipline your disappointment, THAT takes greater strength in my opinion. Sure, all of this is easier said than done, but not everything in life is supposed to be easy.

I just thought I’d share that with you all because perhaps you’re going through a similar situation, one that leads you to constant disappointment. So let’s try something new, let’s not lower our expectations, but learn how to discipline our disappointment. I think if you can do that, you can do anything and the sky’s the limit.

-beautifuldarkmystery

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i find this very interesting.

So I’m taking an Intro in Career Writing Class and I absolutely love it so far. Writing has always been a strong point and I love the books we’re reading on how to become better writers. It may not have anything to do with my major, but who knows…I may need this stuff some day. Plus the professor really likes me, so that’s a bonus.

Anyways, what I wanted to write about is blogging. I find it so fascinated that people, such as myself, tend to hide so much from family and friends…things we don’t necessarily want others to know…yet we come on sites like this, and publicly post our stories. Why is that?

And it’s not so much that I hide all this stuff from them. I tell my mom pretty much anything (because if I don’t, she’ll end up finding anyways, so it’s easier to just be upfront…mothers…). When it comes to my friends, I’m very careful about what I disclose to what people. I know there are people in my life who are just curious. The hard part is sifting through all of those people to get to the good, genuine ones. But even so, now that I’m thinking back on every friendship I’ve encountered, I’ve never found that one person who I felt completely comfortable opening up to…even my best friend of eight years. So what does that say about me?

But there’s a risk with telling your personal stories in such a public way…what if my family and friends DO find out? Well A) That is why my name isn’t posted anywhere on this blog, my avatar covers my identity, and I change the names in my stories, and B) None of my friends use WordPress (that I know of) or are bloggers, so I highly doubt they will ever find this. Basically, like I said, I wanted to create this vessel where I can get out whatever it is I’m thinking, good, bad, all of it.

I think for me personally, I like the idea of getting non-biased opinions about my life from other people who’ve experienced similar situations. Another thing is that I’m sitting behind a computer screen, where no one can see me. It’s almost like there’s a sense of security. And yeah, you may judge me for that and I may be a hypocrite for saying this because I’ve always been against people hiding behind computer screens. I’m talking about people who go online anonymous and start harassing and bullying people. That I don’t approve of. I’m not saying that what I’m doing is right either. But I believe everyone needs their own escape…one their friends or family don’t know about, where they can never find you. That’s what this blog is for me.

I apologize if this seems super disjointed. I’m really just rambling and writing down whatever comes to mind.

-beautifuldarkmystery

How do you escape your everyday life? Does it work for you?