wine is bad for you.

So here’s an interesting story that involves me and my mother. So when I was little, I was always taught in school that drugs and alcohol are bad. When I found out that wine had alcohol in it and that my mom was drinking it, I was furious! I used to get so mad at her whenever she drank wine that I would lock myself in my room out of anger.

Bless my mom…one day at a family gathering that was held at my house, my mom was drinking a glass of wine. I stormed out of the kitchen and locked myself in my room, as usual. When my mom came and found me she asked me why I was so upset and I told her it was because she was drinking wine and I didn’t like that. She then said, “Well Gramps (my grandpa) drinks wine, but you don’t get mad at him.” I replied with, “Because he’s not my mom.” Seeing the tears, the pain, and the hurt in my eyes, my mom took me by the hand and led me to the kitchen. She showed me the glass of wine and proceeded to pour it down the drain. She made sure I saw this happening so that I would know she wouldn’t be drinking wine for the rest of the night. As a matter of fact, I think that was the last time she ever drank wine until I grew out of that phase and realized that wine isn’t necessarily bad for you.

Looking back on it now, I feel like a complete loser, but as a child, all of that completely makes sense. I thought my mom was harming herself by consuming what I thought was this toxic beverage. But on that day, my mom made a sacrifice for me. Because I was that important to her, she never drank wine after that night. She didn’t have to do that, but because she loves me and she wanted to see me happy, she did what was best for her kid.

Today, my mom and I still look back on that and laugh. It’s just interesting to tap into the mind of a child and to try and remember what I was thinking at the time and all of that. My mom truly is the best for what she did for me.

-beautifuldarkmystery

Can you think of an instance where your mom/dad made a sacrifice for you as a child? How did it make you feel?

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living straight-edge.

It’s a lifestyle. It’s a choice. It doesn’t mean I’m better than anyone else. This is the way I want to live my life. I’m not going to judge the people who don’t choose this lifestyle so they shouldn’t judge me for the one I choose.

What is the definition of straight-edge? In general, someone who’s straight-edge chooses not to engage in smoking, drugs, alcohol, and promiscuous activities. For some, straight-edge can be a little more extreme such as following a vegetarian or vegan diet or refraining from consuming caffeine or prescription drugs. For me it’s the former, so that’s what I’m referring to when I say “straight-edge” throughout the rest of this post.

For one thing, I care a lot about other people’s opinions of me. I realize that this is my life and I shouldn’t care about what they think of me, but for my whole life, I’ve been seen as the good girl…the one who follows the rules, never gets into trouble, and stays classy. I’d like to uphold that image not only for them but for me as well. Part of upholding this image also comes from the fact that I never want to dishonor or disappoint my parents. I want to prove to them that they’ve raised a good daughter who can make decisions for herself. I guess another part of it comes from being somewhat religious and I want to respect that. It’s just the way I choose to represent myself, not saying that it’s better than everyone else.

I think out of all my close friends I can think of, I’m the only one who’s never drank, smoked, or done drugs. Over the years, I think that this is part of the reason why most of those friendships ended. They all know I don’t do those things, so why would they ask me to hang out if that’s what they’re going to do?  Yeah, it sucks, but again…we all live our own lives and we all have to make these decisions for ourselves.

At times, it’s sucked being the only one in my group of friends who doesn’t engage in those activities. Yes, I HAVE felt isolated and felt that it would be much easier if I just conformed to their lifestyle. But every time I’ve felt that way, I stop myself and think that I shouldn’t conform to a certain lifestyle just to fit in. I want to stay honest with myself.

So for those of you who are like me, unfortunately, sometimes it will suck. People will call you boring or think you’re better than everyone else because you’re “pure,” but just remember that you get to choose the lifestyle you want, but don’t change it just to fit in with your friends. If you’re lucky enough to find a good group of people with the same lifestyle as you then hey, that’s awesome. It is what it is and I can’t be in control of everything. Life goes on.

-beautifuldarkmystery

Are you straight-edge? If so, how has this affected your friendships (if at all)?