under his spell.

Today is Wednesday, which means I had my class with him. We’re going to work on a group project together which is great, because I’m looking forward to spending more time with him. As soon as I left class and got to the library to begin my 3-hour break, he texted me and asked if I was free because he got out of class early. I don’t know if I’m overanalyzing this, but I’m pretty sure that means I was the first person he thought about because obviously he wanted to see me. When I asked him why his class got out so early, he said it was because they were supposed to be working on a group project. So he left and came to see me. I don’t think that’s a very good thing, but these are definitely actions and he’s showing me that he likes me…which is good!

So he hung out with me for a little bit today, which made me really happy. Now I can’t even concentrate on any of my homework because all I’m thinking about is him. Boys…why do they do this to us. The conversation we had wasn’t awkward like it has been, which is good. We’re becoming more comfortable around each other. He came up from behind me and gave me a hug, which made me smile. We joked around, he made fun of me as usual. At one point he hugged me and said, “You know I love you.” I know this wasn’t meant in a romantic sense, but I don’t know…to hear the words come out of his mouth made me feel special. I’ve never heard those words from a guy’s mouth, let alone have it be directed at me…even if in a friendly way. To be honest, I don’t know that I love him in a romantic way yet. It’s hard to tell. I feel like the word is used so loosely so I want to be careful. I’ve heard that you KNOW when you’re in love. I guess because I’ve never experienced it before, I’m not sure what it will feel like or how I will know. It’s a little far-fetched at the moment, but just maybe he’ll be that person I say “I love you” to. But if so, that’ll be a while from now.

He sat really close to me, so I tried to sit closer to him. It wasn’t awkward at all. I think we just need to let things happen naturally. As stupid and obvious as it seems. We were the most comfortable we’ve been around each other and we didn’t say anything about relationships or dating. This will be an interesting journey, but I’m along for the ride.

I don’t know. I feel like I’m beginning to open up to him. Eventually I want to be able to share parts of my life with him. And of course, I want to know about him. I want him to be able to share things with me as well. I really like him. I really do. I hate feeling this way in a sense because it’s like I’m under this spell. I try not to allow people to have control over me, but he’s one of those people. I’m starting to fall…


Have you ever been in love? If so, what was it like?

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